so when i last left off, about six days ago, i sounded pretty miserable, upset, lost, and hopeless. i think shortly after i realized what was wrong. i remembered that the reason i hadn't gone absolutely mad over the school year was because of boces, and the projects i'd get caught up in. i haven't drawn anything all summer, which is okay because nobody really draws all summer unless they are taking classes. kristina, ott, and alyssa all haven't drawn anything all summer either, although i think ott did a lot of sewing. well, that's alright cause who has time for anything besides partying during the summer? once all my friends were away at school, it wasn't okay. the first few days they were gone, i did nothing. i watched television, slept, and ate junk food. i knew exactly what i had to do. the next day i went out and got a brand new sketchbook. let me just tell you, best idea ever. my mind is so clear now. i draw whatever i feel like drawing, what i'm thinking about, i write down my thoughs in envelopes and add them in, whatever it is i feel like doing. it's around the same size as my sketchbook from before summer, which is pretty big, if any of my friends remember me lugging it around. the point is, i've had this sketchbook for about five days and it's already half way full. i've gotten so much out, thought of so many new ideas, caught up on what i've missed, and when i'm doing nothing but drawing all day, i don't feel like i'm wasting away. the last few days i've felt pretty great. i still see a select few people a lot. well, since my phone has turned into my new digital camera, i took some pictures of my favorite pages from my sketchbook before. i only took pictures of a few, because if i took pictures of all of them, my phone would explode. it's not nearly as good as my previous sketchbook, but it's just a place to put down stuff. i always meant to post pictures of that sketchbook but i just never did. all of my best friends have already seen it anyways. well, if you remember how that book was witty and creative. this book is weird and stupid. a lot of the pictures aren't done. i wanted to just get some general ideas down and then finish it all gradually. i named the sketchbook, "my month at home."
(cause it feels like you.)
when sashi saw this she said, "this is bat country!"
drawn during the blackout.
promise me that, no matter how old i am,
even if i am 30, i can be the flower girl
at your wedding. -jenna"
that is a terrible idea. you're stupid
for even asking."
then wrote again,
no, you can't be my flower girl because
you'll probably be drunk and i don't want
you dropping flowers all crooked and fucking
up my wedding. -kevin"
the drunken sexy eyes!
maybe, i'll post more another time.
i hope it doesn't look too dumb.